Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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