I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
