Dual....:-)
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize