we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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