Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
