sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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