it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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