I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
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