Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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