and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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