there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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