put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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