There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
