Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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