Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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