Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
You need a sexual gate keeper
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Randomize