so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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