He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
