Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
worst night to have a conscience
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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