I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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