about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
And then my night got REAL pukey
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
