We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize