"it" just moved
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize