I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
