Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
