Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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