check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
