Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
