Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Randomize
