I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
