Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
We were destined to go to rehab together
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize