So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
