I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
