we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
