hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Randomize
