Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
