a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Even my vagina gasped.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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