Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
