Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I smell stomach acid.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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