My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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