weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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