It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
