He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
