Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
how do flat chested girls get laid?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
