Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Randomize
