I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
