When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
