she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I forgot how hot balto sounded
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
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