Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
