I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
This is my gift to your gina
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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